Monday, June 13, 2011

Let's Conclusion

I have noticed something very important.
When my son does what he calls a "bun dance", wherein he very stiffly sways his bottom back and forth like a nudist metronome, my wife thinks it is cute:
When I do it, a little part of her dies inside:
This has lead me to a very important conclusion.
When something is small, it is cute. When something is big, it is not cute.
Example: Bonsai Tree
Red Wood tree:
Empire State Building:
 The Shire:

I could go on, so I will.
small stuffed bear = cute.
giant stuffed bear = inconvenient, trying too hard, I am still not taking him back that cheating bastard

small foot = precious, let's make cement casts of it
big foot = I hope he is not real because I am alone in the woods right now

beanie hat = cute and old-fashioned
helicopter = loud and crashes frequently

beanie hat on small head = cute and hilarious
beanie hat on large head = impaired, keep polite distance from person

Send me your own discoveries about the small/big:cute/not cute principal and we will make some theories together.


  1. baby teeth=cute
    big teeth=horse face

    little feet=really cute or Japanese
    big feet=clown

    little brain=small iq, which could lead to saying cute things maybe
    big brain=alien

  2. unfertilized woman = meh...
    pregnant woman = CUUUTTTEEEE

    thought I'd offer some counter-evidence

  3. small amount of money in bank account=ugly
    lots of money in bank account=so beautiful

    bald with a smattering of tiny hairs=i am sad
    a full head of shaggy wonderful man hair=please God give me this for Christmas

    I am always open to counter-evidence