Wednesday, March 9, 2011

The Big Time

Since someone in Vietnam looked at this blog for an indeterminate amount of time, according to the stats page, I felt encouraged enough to do another toy review.

Review #2: Stretch Screamer, Character Unknown, Toy Quest

He has the thousand yard stare of a man who has seen too much, who has been endlessly tortured, made to scream in pain while many hands pulled his arms out from his body as far as they possibly could go. And then always, always, the bead-filled rubber limbs drew back into themselves, a miraculous act of self-healing made futile by the hands every ready to perform the terrible cruelty again. Worse still is the laughter that comes when he can take no more and lets out his strangely sped up sounding groans of agony.

Why, he asks? Why do I have a deflated, balloonish head?

Why did they put the speaker in my bottom?

Am I even a toy?

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